Clearly there are no rules, only what lovers have known since Antony and Cleopatra: "Pay attention, be kind, and be loving". But the following Top Ten List might be a useful reminder! Enjoy!
1. Guys: Great sex starts in the kitchen! Wash the dishes, take out the trash, give her a break, let her know she's appreciated. Romance and exhaustion do not mix -- think about it! (Besides, standing there, side by side, washing and drying those dishes, hands could get to roamin' and motors could get to tickin' ...the most amazing things do happen!)
2. Gals: Tell that old fool just exactly what you've been waiting for! Most males are notoriously poor mind readers, they just don't "get it". So tell him! "A little softer" or "let me show you" goes much further than, "How come you never know what I want?"
3. Guys: Take time! Sex is about fun, relaxation, laughter and love -- this is not a competition or a 50-yard dash to the finish line! Start slow, let it build, then finish strong. A glass of wine, maybe some music, a backrub, even a few minutes of silence can shift the mood and make things verrrry interesting!!
4. Gals: Make Time! How often does sex happen last thing at night, with two exhausted people trying to find each other in the dark? Or, first thing in the morning, half asleep, with bad breath? If sex is important, why not treat it like getting your haircut or picking the kids up after school? In other words, schedule time, put it on the calendar and treat it as a key part of keeping yourself and the family running smoothly.
5. Guys: Think about your 4th date with the woman you love, after you were well acquainted but everything still felt new and exciting. Remember thinking about it, scheduling it, making dinner reservations? Remember being on time? Did you bring flowers, maybe plan something romantic or special? Remember taking a shower and using cologne? Well, guess what -- she's still special and she's still waiting!
6. Gals: If you want great sex, seduce him! This is not rocket science! Most guys are sooooo easy. They're "visual" -- show him what he likes. They're easily flattered -- whisper what he wants to hear. Touch him right there, or if you prefer, right THERE!!! Tease him, just don't be a tease.
7. Guys: Surprise her. Women love that. And, the beauty is, almost anything will work. Surprise her with flowers, with a card, get a baby-sitter for the evening, put a note on the windshield of her car. Even surprise her by cleaning the bathroom! Almost anything will work, just be kind, be gentle, and put a little thought into it.
8. Gals: With all the talk about "size", remember that a man's biggest sex organ is his imagination -- so use your own! Everyone has fantasies -- some romantic, some kinky, maybe even a few that are slightly dangerous or outrageous. What are yours? And, what are his? Why not play dress-up? Why not go on a date with someone "new"?
9. Guys: I just told the gals you have a great imagination -- don't make me a liar! Use it! How long has it been since you had sex in the back seat of a Ford? Would she enjoy a date with a spy? Being seduced by a plumber or "the cable guy"? Is your shower big enough for two? Ever done it at the office -- how about her office?
10. Gals: Take time to add variety and spice with tasteful magazines, toys, movies and beautiful lingerie. For most people (including men) pornography quickly turns into a turn-off, but a little satin and lace, maybe some sensual pictures or using common household items in a whole new way can sure add delight to the old routine. Explore, experiment, lock the bedroom door and play some brand new games! As they say, "Just do it!"
? Copyright 2003 by Philip E. Humbert. All Rights Reserved. This article may be copied and used in your own newsletter or on your website as long as you include the following information: "Written by Dr. Philip E. Humbert, writer, speaker and success coach. Dr. Humbert has over 300 free articles, tools and resources for your success, including a great newsletter! It's all on his website at: http://www.philiphumbert.com