We strive for excellence in our lives, going at full throttle, but sometimes we are faced with a situation where all we do is "hurry up and wait".
That's when we need to learn about coping.
C is for Conscious.
Conscious slowing down is required here, as we take
stock of what is really happening in our life.
It is not like tuning out, we are fully aware that
we are in the moment and observing ourselves,
as it were.
Life has hit us with something sudden and usually
it is somsthing, unpleasant or unwanted, such as
divorce, death of a loved one or a job loss.
Opt-in to the process in your time and at your own
Again this does not mean "zoning out", as the kids
It means that you will face the situation in your
own personal style.
Do you need to be alone to cry, meditate, do some
Are your friends and family what you need? Say so!
This is much like opting in, however, where the former
one is more an attitude the latter is more hands on.
Take part in your eventual re-emergence this issue or
Again, at your pace.
If you feel you are not ready to see a certain person
or attend a function, make a courteous refusal.
You can explain that you don't feel up to it, but
would like to be asked again in the future.
Your ongoing involvement is a big part of the coping
There will be steps that you must go through that
will taking you closer to coming out on the other
side of the experience.
It's more beneficial for you to take small,timely,
forward moving steps than to make huge leaps and
then have to retreat or re-start.
Negotiate with yourself or your support circle for
things you need help with.
If there children depending on you at this time, there
are things others can do for you, so you can have more
strength and focus to provide the relative stabilty that
the children will need.
Can someone shop for groceries, so that you can
pick up the kids from school?
Maybe that's all you can manage for the day.
Get help preparing meals, doing laundry, etc.
Some of us find it very hard to ask for help,
but using your energy wisely is a must, if you
are to recover your "old" self.
Gratitude is important for so many reasons.
It shows acknowledgement and appreciation, with
no regard for the magnitude or humbleness of the
gift, it's enough that it was given.
So thank everyone for their help during your
Don't be driven to try to "pay" them back!
A sincere, heart-felt thanks with a well chosen
card is enough.
They"ll be happy just to have the old you back.
Gratitude for the lesson to be learned in the
crisis may take a long time.
But that may eventually come.
For now you've survived and your alive with
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