The majority of theories on how to pick up girls were compiled by guys who had problems with women and tried to get better. Therein lies the very nature of the problems with most theory. They all assume that you, going over to the girl, have less value then her. By assuming this, you're forced to play a role of lower value. Why on earth are you assuming you are worth less then the girl? I don't care how hot she is!
This is especially true of the rapport versus attraction theory. The theory is: assuming you have two glasses that you need to fill attraction and rapport, the attraction glass must be filled before she will pay attention to your rapport. Well this theory suffers greatly from 'my rapport isn't high enough value for her to listen to.
What your saying is that you have to WORK for her ATTENTION. By thinking this, you PLAY into the role of having less value. Let me put it to you this way, if you are a nerd and you walk over to a hot girl and she says "bug off," you're probably going to turn around and walk away right? Then your going to come up with strategies to make her pay attention. Now what if you were better looking then Brad Pitt, had more money then Donald Trump, and she said that. You would probably laugh. And she would respond differently because you responded differently.
You see all the outer problems stem from internal responses. What you believe shapes your reality. And if you believe you need to fill an attraction glass- that you need to fight for her attention you are falling into the frame that you are inherently NOT good enough.
Well my friend, this is BASED on FALSE assumptions that you are not good enough and therefore must get her interested. If you assume anything at all- instead assume she loves to hear your rapport and get to know you. All people WANT- NEED to be loved. they just have filters. You should assume your better then the guys she filters out, and laugh away any resistance. Why bother juggling and dancing, and doing all kinds of routines just to get her attention. Respond differently to resistance, respond with confidence and you can forget the two glass theory. How you respond to her should MAKE her interested by displaying a stronger reality.
Like my business partner Cameron Teone always used to say- it is like the scene in the Matrix where Neo must jump across the buildings. He can't do it until he truly believes. Well, I am telling you to believe in yourself and knock over the attraction glass. You DON'T need it. It is a theory born from insecurity.
All you need is rapport: confident rapport. So what's the difference between insecure rapport and confident rapport? It comes down to your inner beliefs. Do you believe she's going to listen and like what you have to say about yourself. You should. In fact she should be hanging on every word you say because you believe she needs you. If you have that inch of doubt, that means you believe she isn't ATTRACTED to you, and you need to build the attraction then. But what if you didn't have that doubt? Girls can smell confidence, and they can definitely detect any insecurity. They will see the confidence you have in yourself when you are straight forward and you just assume they will like you. And they WILL respond positively. Remember an inch of doubt and you're dead in the water.
The next big question is how can I get this confidence? Well... see us at a workshop.
Seth Parker
Seth Parker has written an ebook about dating which will soon be at Fidentia'a website
He is one of the instructors who teaches dating confidence to men in live workshops.
http://www.fidentia.org