Do you suffer from emotional clutter? Is suffering even the
right word? Maybe it is, maybe a better description is 'living
with' emotional clutter. Emotional clutter is like an addiction.
You carry your emotional baggage around thinking you can easily
handle it, especially if you treat it like it doesn't exist.
Eventually it reaches a point when you feel it's out of control,
or even worse, you are out of control.
Learning how to 'let go' is the cornerstone of cleaning emotional
clutter. It can be one of the most empowering experiences of
your life. As you let go, you free up space to expand, unleashing
the reasons why you hold onto your feelings.
Emotional clutter is a form of interference. When a river is
blocked with trees, logs, bushes, etc. the water doesn't flow
easily. The river begins to stagnate. So many people ask me why
their lives are so difficult, why they always feel stuck. My
answer is based on this same principle of the river being
cluttered with debris.
Our emotional debris is like deadwood in the river. The more you
remove and eliminate the deadwood, the better the flow. Generally
we hold onto emotional clutter because there is fear, and often
shame as well. When we finally make the decision to clear the
deadwood, or debris, it means facing the fear and doing it
anyway.
If your inner landscape is cluttered, your outer landscape may
reflect that. Often people with emotional baggage collect
material baggage in the form of clutter in their homes. Clearing
the external clutter is marvelous, but unless you also clear the
emotional clutter, you may be destined to repeat the cluttered
house over and over again.
You may think that hanging onto things keeps you secure, so you
don't feel loss and scarcity. In fact, that is far from the
truth. We hold onto things because we already feel loss and
scarcity. It only amplifies the feelings.
One of the first rules of manifesting abundance is to pay
yourself first and to tithe 10%. Give it away, even if you feel
you don't have enough. This is the act of trust. It shows faith
in the knowledge that abundance will come back to you ten fold
and there is abundance for everyone.
Holding onto clutter and emotional baggage may be the way you
feel worth, or self confidence. It may be a false sense of
strength and security. Remember, these are the times when you
alone are holding the deadwood in place to block the river.
Many people are afraid to cry. They fear that if they simply let
go then they will be washed away in an uncontrollable flood of
tears. The truth is, once the dam is clear, there is an initial
surge of water, eventually slowing to a steady flow.
It is the holding that causes so much pain. As you hold onto
feelings, refusing to acknowledge them, you put yourself in a
very tedious juggling act. You have assumed the role of guard,
caretaker, juggler and strongman, not to mention judge and
critic. There is plenty of fodder for the judge/critic to use to
berate you and deem you unworthy.
Now all this could have been easily avoided, had you simply felt
the feelings at the time of the incident. Sadly, the times we
are really good at that are when we are very young. Something
hurts = we cry, we're angry = we yell, stamp our feet, etc. I
say this is sad because it is our ever-so enlightened society
that has taught our parents to stop that process.
How many times have I heard in the grocery store a youngster
being told not to cry, stop being upset, don't be angry, etc.
This is when we learned to hold the feelings. This is when the
dam began. Yes, we can thank our parents, but they were only
doing their best with the same thing that happened to them when
they were little. It is a societal pattern and it is rampant.
Learning how to let go is relatively easy once you know the
steps:
1. Awareness
2. Intention
3. Choice
4. Action
These simple steps are used consistently in the process of
releasing emotional clutter. Knowing how to use the tools is
easy, it's actually the sorting needed to create the awareness
that can be the most challenging part.
Sorting is the precursor to transformation and change. It is
opening the door so that you actually have the awareness. This
step can require assistance. It's difficult to do when you are
standing in it.
It's like the TV series 'Clean Sweep' on TLC. Organizing
professionals come into your home and help you sort your physical
clutter. You can then have awareness, see your intention to
change the situation, choose what you keep and what you
eliminate, then take action by throwing things away or having a
yard sale. The end result is usually two newly cleared,
clutter-free and renovated rooms. You can see some emotional
awareness happening, but remember, it took years of inner
emotional cluttering to develop into these seriously cluttered
homes.
The emotional changes do not happen overnight. There is a
beginning sort and the first shades of awareness. Will the
owners of the home return to their emotional habit of clutter?
They may because their inner landscape was not cleared.
Generally this inner clearing works differently. The inner
clearing happens, and then the external cleaning happens as a
result. The lasting effects are there because the people
actually released the emotional deadwood creating the clutter in
their homes.
It's simple, when we feel cluttered inside, we create clutter
outside. One exception to this rule are the obsessive 'neat
freaks.' They obsessively clean externally attempting to create
inner order because they are so emotionally cluttered and may not
know how to deal with the emotional deadwood. Either way, it is
an act of control. We control our outer circumstances if we feel
completely out of control on the inside. Or, we are so
controlled on the inside, holding back the emotion that we are
totally out of control on the outside. Which are you?
Of course, there is a third option, which we can all aspire to-
the balanced person, centered, at peace within and living a
clutter-free life. In fact, balanced people may be detached from
material things. They have created an open space for flow. We
can look at these folks with awe and amazement because they
experience peace within. No longer is life about control and
chaos, a battle between the inner and outer emotional life. It
is now about peace and balance.
Which lifestyle would you prefer?
? 2004 Jodie Foster
Jodie Foster is an Intuitive Counselor who assists clients to create extraordinary transformations in their everyday lives. Her work is uplifting, empowering and success-oriented. You can visit Jodie's website at http://www.illuminationsnetwork.com for further information and to schedule a private intuitive session. You can also look for weekly updates to her blog at: http://intuitiveinnovations.blogspot.com.
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