Henry Vlll and Elizabeth Taylor, who between them had fourteen spouses, would have had quite a few headaches planning their weddings. There would be the obvious ones ? Shall I wear white for my marriage to Eddie Fisher? After all, even though this is my fourth wedding I am only 27 and white looks magnificent on me! And the less obvious ones ? Should I invite all my ex ex ex wives' relatives to the wedding? For if the truth be known, I've always been more fond of them, than of her.

But the greatest quandary for all couples, whether marrying for the first time or the eighth, is the choice of a honeymoon. That special spot that will be a source of wonder and conversation for years to come ? possibly even for ever!

There are those who swear that surprising the bride is one of the better beginnings to a perfect honeymoon. But only if the couple have identical expectations of what a perfect honeymoon is - say the wives who were surprised, but not impressed.

Then there are those couples who select a place because it promises either constant activity, or no activity at all. Again, it works only if both partners are either lethargic, or active.

A trip overseas sounds romantic to almost all couples, and especially to those who have never travelled before. Those who have, complain of unexpected delays, missing luggage, constant search for trains, buses and taxis and expenditure of money that plays havoc with their initial budget. All of which brings a level of stress which some couples are unaware of, and would avoid if they did.

Then there are those special resorts that cater almost exclusively to the honeymooning market. In particular, there are those romantic islands which promise nothing but eating, drinking and dancing day in and day out. Sounds great, if both partners want to do all three things together. But what if one partner is into dancing, while the other can't tell one foot from the other? And one partner likes one glass of wine with a meal, while the other wants two or three pre-dinner drinks? And worse, what if the island is so small that the only place you can eat is at the resort and every meal costs an arm and a leg?

So how can you have a sizzler of a honeymoon?

Firstly, whether the honeymoon is to be a week-end or a fortnight, it is desirable that both partners want the same thing, whether this happens to be a trip of adventure and discovery, or lazing around in a hammock.

Secondly, money should never be a problem on a honeymoon. An extravagant weekend is preferably to a penny-pinching week.

Thirdly, a honeymoon doesn't have to take place immediately after the wedding, especially if there are extra responsibilities such as children from another marriage to consider. Perhaps a few months further on, when the new family has shaken itself into some order, a honeymoon will be a much more relaxing affair than immediately after the wedding.

And, of course, if you've blown all your money on an earth-shaking wedding, nothing to stop you from spending a week or two alone in your own home, having told everyone that you will be going away.

Take the phone off the hook and start getting to know each other all over again.

Vlady is an author of two traditional books, "The Complete Book of Australian Weddings" and "The Small Organisation Handbook". Her latest book is an ebook entitled "Honeymoon! A Sizzle or a Fizzle".

To learn more about Vlady, visit her at her website http://www.vlady-celebrant.com