Choosing a baby name is an important job, so make your
children feel important by letting them help you name the
new baby. After all, you're not the only one who's having a
baby - your whole family is ! Use the process of naming the
baby as an opportunity to get your other children involved in
and excited about their new brother or sister, and make the
process fun. Try a little humor, with wild list-making
sessions that may eventually lead you to the perfect baby
name that will fill that vacant space on your family tree.
Here are some of the points, both serious and silly, that you
can encourage your children to consider when sifting
through the thousands of possible baby names that are
floating around out there. I've added a few sample names,
from appropriate to absurd, to make your children laugh and
enjoy the name choosing process, and to get your whole
family thinking.
First of all, don't choose a first name that is SO odd and
unusual that, as your child grows up, his or her friends will
endlessly make fun of it. Perhaps "Sassafras" or
"Tintinabulation" are not the best name choices. On the
other hand, you may not want a name that is SO common
that every third child in the playground has it, too. Of course,
what is "too common" changes every few years. When I was
a child in the early 1960s, every other kid answered if
someone called out "Bobby" or "Joey."
You might also want to avoid a baby name that is so
up-to-the-minute and trendy that it may sound ridiculous by
the time your child hits kindergarten. I'd think twice before
naming a baby "Megabyte" or "Bloggy." Then again, if the
name is VERY old fashioned, that can also lead to taunting
by other children. How would you like to be in the third grade
and be named "Horatio Cornelius" ? Other old fashioned
names, though, such as Rachel and Sarah, never seem to
go out of style.
Sometimes a name sounds really cute on a tiny baby, but
inappropriate on a mature adult. Should anyone have to go
through life as "Dimples" or "Pinky" or "Bitsy" ? Still, there
are other names that may suit a serious bank executive, but
sound too somber for a toddler - take "Harold Thaddeus" or
"Mildred Hortense," for instance. Shoot for some sort of
middle ground between cutesy-pie babyish and dour
fuddy-duddy.
You may also want to avoid names, or combinations of first
and middle name, that have a very strong negative
association with a particular person or event in history, like
"John Wilkes" or "Lee Harvey."
Consider the spelling of any baby name that you and your
children like. Will it be so difficult to spell or to pronounce
that your child will be condemned to a lifetime of seeing and
hearing people mangle his or her name and having to
endlessly correct them ? As a case in point, I might have
been named "Ides" (pronounced "Ee-dess") but, luckily for
me, my parents dropped the idea for fear that I might wind
up being called "Ides" (as in "Beware the Ides of March").
After all of the "don'ts" I've mentioned, how about some
"dos" for your kids to ponder. Maybe you'd like to name the
baby in honor of a special relative, past or present, or a
close friend of the family. Think about all the people in your
life who've been dear to you. You may even choose to show
respect for a famous person you really admire.
Another possibility is to celebrate your ethnic roots by
choosing a current or traditional name that comes from your
family's cultural heritage, or some branch of it, if your
lineage blends several different ethnic backgrounds.
How about naming the baby for a book or movie character
that you and your children love ? Perhaps a little "Harry" or
"Dorothy" is waiting to be born. (Possibly a tiny "Pinocchio"
or "Thumbelina," although those may be a bit extreme.)
The meanings of baby names are a popular element to
consider. You could begin with a special meaning, like
"beloved" or "gentle" or "courageous," and then see what
names stem from those words. Different languages and
cultures can lead you to various name choices, all with the
same specific meanings. If you want to avoid negative
meanings, however, I suppose that "Picklepussia" would be
out of the running.
You may want to use a particular letter of the alphabet as
your starting point. If you're expecting a baby girl you might,
for example, list every girl's name that you can think of that
begins with the letter V - Valerie, Victoria, Veronica, Violet,
and so forth. For a more novel approach, how about drawing
from all the first names that contain six letters - Joseph,
Daniel, Joshua... or seven - Matthew, Malcolm, William...
If you find a first name that you all like, consider its variant
forms, too. For example, Christine might also lead you to
Kirsten, Christina, Kristen, or Crystal. A potential baby Mary
might wind up being named Miriam, Marion, Maryanne,
Marie, Maria, Marilyn, or Marlene.
For any name that you all like, try it on for size and live with it
for a while. If you name the baby Melissa, will she end up
being called "Missy" or "Mel" ? Think of all the nicknames
that any given name might spawn and be sure that you can
live with the nicknames, as well as the full version of the
name. Avoid inadvertently negative nickname-producing
names. Don't name the baby "Smellonius" if you don't want
him to be called "Smelly" by his schoolmates.
Once you've arrived at a short list of first names that you,
your spouse and your children can all agree upon, look at
each name within the context of the full name that it will be a
part of. Find a first and middle name that suit and go nicely
with each other, and with the sound of your last name.
"Ernesto Casimir Jones" might not create the most pleasing
effect and "Calliope Bathsheba Schmidt" may not quite roll
off the tongue.
Test lots of combinations of your family's favorite name
choices until you hit upon the perfect one. Then be sure to
examine the resulting set of initials. You don't want to give
your baby a beautiful and well thought out full name, only to
later discover that the monogrammed handkerchiefs will
read "P.I.G" or "Y.U.K." or "D.U.M." So avoid the likes of
"Philip Ian Green" (alias "Pig") or "Yelburton Uriah Keep"
(commonly called "Yuck") or "Doris Ursulla Martin" (a.k.a.
"Dumb").
If your favorite name passes that test, next imagine it as it
will be used by different people on different occasions.
Using John Q. Public as an example, let's look at all of its
forms: John Quincy Public, John Q. Public, John Public, J. Q.
Public, Johnny P., J.Q.P., J.Q., and even "J.P. loves S.A."
carved on a tree. Explore every possibility for any inadvertent
gaffs.
Picture your chosen name as it will appear in various real
life situations: how will it look on a school register ? on a
diploma ? on a resum? ? in the oval office ? What
impression will it create ? Will it sound dignified ? snobbish
? flakey ? classy ? friendly ? pretentious ? dumb ? What
would you like to shoot for - interesting and harmonious, but
neither too weird nor too dull ?
Once you've found a combination of names that can pass
muster and meet every criteria set forth, and that you're all
just crazy about, there's one more factor to consider. How
does this new name go with those of your other children ?
Imagine shouting down the street to call your kids in for
dinner, or listing your children's names on a government
form, or signing a holiday card. Do you really want that
birthday card to your favorite aunt to read "Happy Birthday,
Aunt Emma ! Love Terry, Jason and Tondaleo" ?
If you can jump over this final hurdle you've done it ! You've
found the perfect baby name for that little someone who's
soon to be a part of your family, and your children will be
more enthused about the baby's arrival if they've helped you
choose that name. It will truly be THEIR baby, too.
Make the process as lively and amusing as you can to get
them into the spirit of it. For each point that I've mentioned,
encourage your kids to draw up long lists of possibilities,
including silly lists. Let them have fun and get all of their
wildest name suggestions out of their systems, too. Create
your own "name the baby" games, such as "What would we
name the baby if we were Martians ?" "What if we'd lived 300
years ago ?" "What if the name had to end with the letter 'a'
?" Use your imagination, and your kids will be sure to use
theirs, too. That perfect name is out there somewhere, you
just need to find it.
Have fun !
Visit Barbara Freedman-DeVito's website at
http://www.childrensclothingbabyclothes.com for baby
clothes, children's clothing and gift items decorated with her
colorful and amusing artwork for kids. Barbara is a
professional storyteller, teacher and artist.