You, I and We

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Our life in society hovers around the concept of 'You?I? We'. The first stage is 'You-You' which is called 'dependent' stage. As a child, we are dependent on others for our needs and expect help and support from others. The dependence can be either emotional or physical. The second stage is 'I ? I', where in we attain relative freedom and corresponding changes are noticeable in terms of speech, behavior, movements, preferences, interests and perceptions.In this stage we act with absolute freedom both mentally and physically. The feeling of 'Me-Mine' will be at a high point during this stage. Typical thought processes will be as follows:

1. I can do anything independently

2. I have a set of tastes, beliefs, desires and goals

3. I am the decision maker of my actions

4. I am responsible for my actions

The final and most important stage is 'We?We', which is a state of maturity, and get out of the earlier restlessness. This stage brings us to realization that we cannot live alone and need help and support of others and do things in mutual cooperation and understanding. Typically in this stage the thought processes are as follows:

1. Let us do this

2. Let us cooperate

3. This is ours

4. We can do this

Broadmindedness and reduced selfishness are the characteristics of this state. Some of us remain stagnated at the 'dependent' stage and further in the life cannot take any decisions independently. People who gradually pass through each of these stages will be successful in life, be it personal or professional. Interdependence stage is the most important one in relation to ones career growth too, for interdependence gives us the capability to communicate effectively and participate in team work.

Ravikumar Uppaluri, holds Masters in Agricultural Sciences and is co-founder of an organization involved in nature conservation and sustainable agriculture.The author can be reached at

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