Discovering an affair in your relationship is indispensable, but that's just the beginning of what you will face. A family court ruling will be rendered either for or against you and your children. A judge will decide for you based on the EVIDENCE, who is the best custodial parent. If your state considers infidelity grounds for divorce, PROOF is essential! If you are party to a legal action, your observations, discoveries and testimony is already tainted with BIAS. This article will give you a few insights to consider. I've identified 5 key reasons you SHOULD hire an investigator and in a few words examine the reasons why.

1. Time is of the essence. Depending on the length of an affair, your spouse may end it without ample opportunity for you to document it. On average affairs last six months to a year and then end without your knowledge. However, in some cases, your spouse will divorce you for the mistress. So waiting to prove your case may be too late. Don't let the opportunity escape you.

2. Satisfy your "Need to Know." Over three decades my agencies have worked for countless clients who spanned the US. More than half of these clients had a "need to know." Finding out the extent of an affair, the identity of the mistress/paramour is indispensable. If you feel a gripping urgency to gratify this need, recognize you share in the feelings with a vast number of others.

3. You should not witness the affair yourself. In one case a client insisted on witnessing her husband activities. I discouraged her. We placed him under surveillance for a "nooner," a lunchtime rendezvous. It was a successful surveillance with an unexpected twist. The subject united with his mistress as we anticipated. They choose a remote parking area in front of a river bank on a dead end street. This was a favorite hangout for teenagers surrounded by woods and plenty of cover from public view. We shadowed them successfully. The hood of his vehicle served their desires and clandestine behavior. Roughly fifteen minutes passed and a female emerged from the nearby woods. She moved toward us. We were concerned she would blow our cover. To our shock it was our client! She was so compelled to witness the affair for herself that she walked through heavy woods and brush to do so. Auspiciously for us and her spouse, no confrontation ensued. Now if it weren't so heartbreaking, the episode would be humorous. Her garb was utterly out of place. A full length white dress was the wrong attire for the woods. It seemed she never realized her mistake. Take my advice, please leave investigations to professionals.

4. Professional Testimony frequently prevails! Finding yourself seated in a courtroom with two opposing attorneys, court employees, is the wrong time to realize how unprepared you are for day. You will need testimony from others. Friends can offer some degree of support for your case. They may hold up under cross examination. If your witness list only includes family and friends, be prepared for a frightful revelation. Even though they are trustworthy try convincing a court system. You are fighting a losing battle. Their innate bias and testimony bear little weight in the final assessment. Are you confident your witnesses' testimony will have credibility? Do they possess the experience you need? After all, you have one chance in most family courtrooms. What if your witness is caught in a lie? You're finished! A judge will rule against you for bringing in someone who is not forthright. Court testimony is enormously helpful, it often decides legal cases. My testimony has always made a positive difference. If your investigator obtains evidence for your case, use it to your family's advantage. Your kids may just have to visit as an alternative to dwelling with you.

5. Your emotions could get you thrown in jail. Domestic investigations always bring concern for private investigative agencies. One notable case resulted in vehicular homicide. The client asked her hired PI for the rendezvous site. She arrived in a rage killing her spouse with the SUV. Clearly, when an investigation is warranted hire a professional and keep your distance. If you conduct your own surveillance, be prepared to defend yourself against a stalking charge. Keep your distance and your head!

For additional information on contracting a PI discover how with my new paperback,"The More You Know ? Getting the evidence and support you need to investigate a troubled relationship." I included an entire chapter on the topic.

? Bill Mitchell 2005

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Top Private Investigator Bill Mitchell recently appeared on the Dr. Phil Show is the author of "The More You Know ? Getting the evidence and support you need to investigate a troubled relationship." For more information about the book, infidelity or cheating husbands, visit http://themoreyouknowpi.com.

To receive a FREE Special Report entitled Emergency Infidelity Survival Plan ? Top Fifteen Steps to implement Right Now! If you suspect an affair send an e-mail to mitchellreports@bellsouth.net with Emergency Plan in the subject line.