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Orgasms - Male and Female

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Orgasms - Male and Female


Better Sex Tips & Techniques:

Content by BetterSex.com - the #1 Authority on Sex.

Tip # 1: The Female Orgasm »

Tip # 2: Function of Female Orgasm »

Tip # 3: Achieving Orgasm »

Tip # 4: The Clitoris »

Tip # 5: Length of a Female Orgasm »

Tip # 6: Male Orgasm Basics »

Tip # 7: Orgasm Competition? »

Tip # 8: Prolonging Pleasure »

Tip # 9: Lubrication and Friction »

Tip # 10: Orgasm and Ejaculation »

Tip # 1: The Female Orgasm

The female orgasm is a subject that has always garnered a lot of attention. The first vibrator was invented in the Victorian era to relieve a woman's "hysteria" by bringing her to orgasm. These vibrators were actually administered by doctors, and used to cure a woman of what we would later accept as a perfectly natural function of a human body: sex drive. During the sexual revolution of the 1960s and 1970s, even the type of a woman's orgasm was debated. At the time, vaginal orgasms, which were triggered by stimulation of the internal G-Spot, were said to be the more "mature" than clitoral orgasms. However, this mode of thinking has been abandoned for the most part in the 21st century.

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Tip # 2: Function of Female Orgasm

No one will argue that we enjoy experiencing orgasms because they feel good. Apart from that, we are aware that the overriding purpose of a male orgasm, physiologically speaking, is to send semen into the vagina for the purpose of fertilizing an egg within the uterus. However, not many people realize that there is a physiological purpose for the female orgasm as well. During the internal spasms of a woman's orgasm, the mouth of the cervix dips down to "catch" any semen that may be present in the vagina, thereby helping pull sperm up and into the uterus. While it is by no means necessary for a woman to orgasm in order to become pregnant, her orgasm can increase the odds for conception to occur.

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Tip # 3: Achieving Orgasm

Nearly every human being is physically able to experience sexual pleasure. But many women in particular claim never to have achieved orgasm. One of the reasons for this is an emotional withdrawal due to feelings of shame or insecurity concerning sex. A way to remedy this is to reconsider attitudes toward sex. Remember that sexuality is normal, healthy, and necessary. Women who have difficulty achieving orgasm can also work with a partner she trusts to move past previous emotional blockages. Sometimes, it is best to simply forget the goal of orgasm and simply enjoy the sensation of being touched. It takes time to change life-long attitudes. Don’t rush yourself, but do continue to think positively about sex and sexuality. This is the best way to develop a healthy sex life.

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Tip # 4: The Clitoris

Perhaps one of the most elusive spots in a woman's anatomy is her clitoris. For some, its mystery is a source of frustration as the clitoris is often the key to triggering the female orgasm. In fact, it is not so difficult to find. The head, or glans, of the clitoris is located just below the top of where the inner lips of the vagina meet. There is often a small flap of skin protecting it, and once lifted, the clitoris can be seen quite clearly. Think of the clitoris as a female's version of a penis. Biologically speaking, it is, although fluids do not pass through this area. During clitoral stimulation, as with penis stimulation, blood flow is increased. This causes the clitoris to become erect, much like a penis. Of course, the size is drastically reduced, but some clitoral erections can be quite prominent.

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Tip # 5: Length of the Female Orgasm

While it may seem to take a long time to achieve female orgasm, the orgasm itself typically lasts only a few seconds. (This is true for men as well.) The female orgasm consists of approximately three to ten rhythmic muscular contractions. These occur to the outer one-third of the vagina, the uterus, and the anal area. Pleasant sensations are typically also felt in the clitoral area and indeed over the whole body. Some women are multi-orgasmic. That is, they are able to achieve several orgasms in fairly rapid succession. Men are typically not able to experience this, as their physical “recovery” time is longer between orgasms.

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Tip # 6: Male Orgasm Basics

When men are sexually stimulated, the reflex centers of the spinal cord begin to emit impulses that move from the cord to the genitals and initiate emission, (the precursor to ejaculation). Fluid from the vas deferens, the prostate, the ampulla, and the seminal vesicles (and even more tiny glands) are sent into the internal urethra by contractions of the groin muscles. This action elicits signals that are transmitted through the pudenda nerves from the spinal cord. Increases in pressure in the urethra cause the semen to be propelled to the exterior, resulting in ejaculation. This phase of emission and ejaculation is termed male orgasm. After ejaculation, erection ceases within 1 to 2 minutes in most males.

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Tip # 7: Orgasm Competition?

Men usually have an easier time achieving orgasm than women. Because of this, many men feel that it’s their obligation to take care of their partner’s sexual needs before their own. While this is an admirable stance to take, over time – particularly in a long-term relationship -- result in a deprivation of enjoyment for the man. Women can remedy this by occasionally giving her partner the freedom to concentrate only on his own pleasure. This can be done by telling him he doesn’t have to worry about pleasuring you; he should only think of himself. Alternately, you can simply have him lie back and enjoy an evening of you pleasuring him completely.

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Tip # 8: Prolonging Pleasure

As a general rule, the longer the stimulation, the larger the release. This is true physically as well as mentally. In order to prolong pleasure during lovemaking and prevent male orgasm from occurring too soon, it’s important to start slowly. Even just talking to each other about the sex you’d like to have is a turn-on, and can initiate arousal. Once you begin to touch, you may wish to begin with a backrub or deep kissing before moving to intercourse. Once you do begin making love, you can also bring a man back from the brink of orgasm with a squeezing technique. Just prior to his orgasm, put your thumb on one side of the base of the penis and the tips of your index and middle fingers on the other side, then squeeze.

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Tip # 9: Lubrication and Friction

Two elements that are important to the male orgasm are lubrication and friction. The correct levels of both need to be achieved in order to achieve orgasm, either through masturbation or intercourse. Not enough lubrication is uncomfortable for both you and your partner, while too much can impede sensation and even cause a numbing feeling. Friction is essential to orgasm, beyond the obvious need for direct physical stimulation of the penis. The quality of an orgasm can improve once you find the level of friction that suite you best. Experiment at the moment you find your orgasm coming on, either by slowing down or speeding up, alternately. Also pay attention to how soft or hard you prefer the stroking motions of masturbation or intercourse at varying points during the sexual experience.

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Tip # 10: Orgasm and Ejaculation

Male orgasm and ejaculation are two distinct entities. This may seem obvious to many, but in reality, many men have mistakenly considered them be one and the same. Just prior to orgasm, the seminal fluids that build up at the base of the penis in the urethral bulb, create the feeling that you're about to ejaculate. While reaching orgasm, the testicles tighten, and the urinary tract closes temporarily so that ejaculate can exit from the penis without interference from the bladder. The muscular contractions are the sensations of orgasm (along with other neurological messages being sent to the brain). However, ejaculation is actually a spontaneous muscle spasm. It is a reflex that arises at the base of the spine and causes the ejection of semen. The average male ejaculates about 3 to 5 ml of semen at a time. Each milliliter holds about 150 to 500 million sperm. This spasm also produces a pleasant sensation, which may be why many men assume orgasm and ejaculation are the same experience.

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