A year ago, a beautiful woman came to see me. Her husband had been cheating on her and she wanted some advice regarding her future. Even though her eyes were dull, shoulders drawn and her face sad, I managed to look beyond that. Did you know that when you go "beyond", you can create new things?

I told her to go look in my bathroom mirror. She came back and I asked her what she saw. "A fool" she replied. I told her that she needs glasses and to go look again. And again. By the third time she was almost in tears but she managed to acknowledge that she was beautiful.

We started on the road to healing the fragments of her spirit. When we are unhappy, especially in times of extreme trauma, the spirit cracks, even fractures into tiny pieces. In order to put that together, you need to start fitting piece by piece.

I used a combination of inner travel meditation and talking to her. The first thing I told her was: NO ONE can make you happy. You need to LIKE yourself and achieve happiness from within. A lover of husband can ADD to that happiness but cant initiate the feeling.

How many times have you said or heard the words: I will be happy if .. and then follows the.. if I win a million, if my husband is less grumpy, if I meet a lover.

Not so. Happiness is the emotion that produces little tingly sensations in the brain. That is why chocolate "uplift" the sprit. The brain sees this as "happy food" and soon you feel better!

In order to really LIKE yourself, you need to embrace your good points and divide your bad points into two groups. There is a group of bad that you can change and one that you can not.

If you are five feet and two inches tall and you do not like it , so sorry , you have to deal with that. No miracle can turn you into a six footer.

If you do not like it when it rains, and become all depressed, you need to see that the depression is triggered by a symptom. No use treating the symptom if the cause is not fixed.

You need to go "beyond" the symptoms to find and fix the cause.

Change what you can and look at what you can't change from a different angle. Did you realise that being short has it's own set of advantages?

Look "beyond" the physical, emotional and the mind. See the perfection of your spirit. If the spirit is allowed to shine through, your emotions and thoughts will lighten and you will "feel" happier.

Nothing is impossible. Nothing does not exsist. Therefor, you need to accept that all things are possible.

No one is just good or bad. If you do not have bad points, there is inbalance, because the YOU as focal point NEEDS good and bad in order to show balance.

Start liking yourself. You are with YOU 24/7. I did not say "like" your bad points, I said :like YOU. Soon you will relax and start looking at the things you do not like, changing what you can and accepting what you cant.

That is when the miracle occurs. When you LIKE yourself, you go "beyond" the barriers of loneliness.

Your appearance change, even if you did nothing to make it look different on the outside. People will be drawn to you because you have a vibration of being content. You will be happy .

Having yourself for a best friend has advantages.You can't lie to yourself. You can be kind to yourself. You will not be "lonely" because in balance, you will not mind times when you are on your own.

Trust yourself and have faith in the Creator. You are not here by coincidence. Go "beyond" and see how being YOU, can change your life and others.

That beautiful young woman listened to me. Soon, her eyes sparkled and she was even lovelier than before. Her shimmering spirit and kind nature drew lots of friends to her. At one stage she even had a choice of men wanting to be with her all the time!

She chose one. She shares her secret of inner and outer beauty. She is her own best friend and she really LIKES herself.

Be you. Like who you are. Trust who you are. If you find that hard, look for someone to help you achieve that. ENJOY discovering your inner beauty!

SilverJade has been advising people on blind faith and free will for many years. She offers free consultations online. Do a search on the name in South Africa.